Waitress is one of my sisters and my favorite movies. Plot spoilers aside, the main character, Jenna, invents delicious-sounding pies for the pie diner at which she works. The pies are all vivid colors and bold flavors.
Some are decadent, like with thick perfect bittersweet chocolate, or fruity, with blackberries and raspberries, or savory, like a quiche made with brie cheese and smoked ham.
Besides creating imaginative pies that all the other characters are absolutely in love with, Jenna names the pies the funniest things: I Hate My Husband Pie, Bad Baby Pie, and Marshmallow Mermaid Pie. One of the other characters, Joe, the pie diner owner, exclaims about one of her pies, “Just a pie! It’s downright expert. A thing’a beauty…how each flavor opens itself, one by one, like a chapter in a book. First, the flavor of an exotic spice hits ya…just a hint of it…and then you get flooded with chocolate, dark and bittersweet, like an old love affair.” (Click here for a list of the funny pie names.)
Anyway, you can see why this type of movie would have me enthralled. In the spirit of “Waitress” and to nix our boredom we had the other night, my sister Rachel suggested we invent a pie. I begrudgingly agreed; she didn’t have any fruit on hand! How could we possibly invent a proper pie without fruit? She insisted we could and told me that I was missing the point. I guess I was.
So we proceeded making the CHOCOLATIEST pie ever: bittersweet baking chocolate, chocolate wafer cookies, raspberry-filled milk chocolate, chocolate candies. Then we added raspberry jam and fluff and some butter. We melted the chocolate together with the fluff and jam, and then poured it on the various wafer crumbles we had created. In a word, delicious.
After quickly baking it, we placed the still-warm pie in the back seat of the car, and ran to pick up our younger sister, Danielle, from work. In the parking lot, Rachel and I appropriately christened our pie, Waiting for Danielle Pie.
After, we drove up to our parents’ house for Mom’s birthday party.
I asked Danielle to bring in the pie.
I sighed, exasperatedly. “The pie in the back…seat…”
I watched her face change from questioning to horror as her hands flew to her backside to find half of the warm pie all over her pants. She had sat in our pie!
“Ah!” Rachel screeched, “How did you NOT feel yourself sitting in a pie?!”
No answer came, as we were all suddenly doubled over, laughing hysterically in our parents’ driveway in the dark.
To capture the full feeling of the pie, we quickly renamed it…Danielle Butt Pie.
Waiting for Danielle Pie
1 pre-baked pie crust
4 squares semi-sweet baking chocolate
2 c. chocolate “filling” (this is the fun part, use whatever you have on hand, but easily melt-able chocolate without a candy shell will work best, like chocolate chips, milk chocolate bars, cookies, etc. )
1 c. marshmallow fluff
1 c. raspberry jam
½ c. butter
1 c. shredded, sweetened coconut
1. Preheat oven to 350F. While oven heats, slowly melt semi-sweet chocolate and chocolate candy in double boiler on stove. (Note: Rachel and I used a small non-stick saucepan on low heat.) Stir constantly. Chocolate can also be safely melted in microwave, stirring contents in 30-second intervals.
2. When chocolate is thoroughly melted, add in butter, fluff, and jam, allowing each to melt a little before adding the next ingredient. Stir continuously until all contents have melted together. Remove from heat.
3. If using cookies or wafers of any sort, crush and crumble cookies into small bits.
4. Add cookie crumbles and coconut to the melted mixture, while the mixture is still warm. Stir to coat.
5. Pour warm mixture into crust and bake in 350F oven for 20-25 minutes until dark brown crust (not burnt) forms on top and contents have set.
6. When pie cools, decorate with layer of white whipped topping. Top with fresh raspberries.